One of my female friends who shall remain nameless is pregnant. I never realized quite what a freak she is:

“We made a lot of tapes,” she told me. “so we probably have That One as well. Think we’ll keep them.”

Me: “So one day your kid is gonna go through your stuff and watch his own conception? You should probably think about that.”

If you hear that story in a court case twenty years down the road after some kid born in ’09 becomes a psychopath… don’t say I didn’t warn anybody.